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 Post subject: Hilarious comments and such!
PostPosted: Sun Apr 18, 2010 10:51 pm 
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It's time we had a thread dedicated to the funny things we've heard, read or perhaps have inadvertently said ourselves. And yes, what you say when you "put your foot in your mouth" also counts!

Here are some tidbits I found on learnfrommyfail.com:

When your otherwise strong teenager asks you to open a soda can in front of his smiling friends,don’t take it as a compliment. Soda is hard to get off the ceiling. #LFMF

When seeing a fellow officer of the opposite sex in public and out of uniform.. NEVER say in front of their spouse.. "you look so different in clothes" #LFMF

If you find yourself standing in the middle of a packed church during a moment of silence and your 3 year old son tugs on your skirt, DO NOT ignore him. What he has to say will not be something to repeat in polite company and an entire church will hear you explain to him that what is happening to his nether regions is a natural phenomenon for boys waking up from a nap. #LFMF

If you haven’t used your coffee thermos in a while, always check to make sure mold hasn’t grown inside it, before you take a big swallow from it at your desk. #LFMF

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 Post subject: Re: Hilarious comments and such!
PostPosted: Sun Apr 25, 2010 8:53 pm 
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I can say some of the funniest things, but does anybody really want to hear what crap I can actually dream up?

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 Post subject: Re: Hilarious comments and such!
PostPosted: Thu May 13, 2010 12:44 am 
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From: Learn From My Fail:

Learn from arachnophobia's fail: If you happen to look down and see a large spider crawling across the crotch of your pants, try to resist the urge to smash it to death before flicking into the floorboard. Your balls with thank you. Also, should you be unable to overcome this reflex, know that, not only will your wife nearly crash the car as she laughs hysterically at your misfortune, but she will also tell everyone you both know, and many people you don’t. #LFMF


Learn from my bad dental experience's fail: A nice soft peanut butter sandwich after the dentist is not a good way to soothe a sore mouth. When numb on novocaine, the inside of your cheek, and a peanutbutter sandwich have about the same texture (until the taste changes). #LFMF

http://learnfrommyfail.com/page/12/

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 Post subject: Re: Hilarious comments and such!
PostPosted: Thu May 13, 2010 7:50 am 
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BeeKay wrote:
If you haven’t used your coffee thermos in a while, always check to make sure mold hasn’t grown inside it, before you take a big swallow from it at your desk. #LFMF


I just threw up in my mouth. :(

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 Post subject: Re: Hilarious comments and such!
PostPosted: Fri Jun 11, 2010 3:18 pm 
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When your slightly aging biology teacher starts trying to imitate a single ladies dance, make sure you have nothing in your mouth. Trust me on this.


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