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 Post subject: Re: You don't drink - you are weird?
PostPosted: Fri Aug 10, 2012 7:56 am 
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RichBitch
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I have noticed that I am meeting lot more people these days who do not drink at all simply out of personal choice / preference. It's your choice Iroto, and no-one can pass any judgement on it

You are strong and you know what is right for you and that can only be a good thing right? :D :hug:

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 Post subject: Re: You don't drink - you are weird?
PostPosted: Fri Aug 10, 2012 12:23 pm 
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As pretty much everyone else has said, the problem is not the person who doesn't drink. To be honest, Iroto-Chan, it sounds like you are hanging out with the wrong people. People with a mature attitude to alcohol, and to life in general, won't judge you for choosing not to drink. I have a group of friends at my university who would probably be stereotypically considered "big drinkers" - they are goths, metalheads, rockers - a lot of them do enjoy a lot of alcohol, but they have never judged me for not being able to drink as much as them, and there is another guy in the gang who doesn't drink at all and nobody has ever judged him, either. If anything, people actually express respect for him controlling his intake of potentially harmful substances.

People who will judge you for your life decisions, especially a life decision like not drinking which can really only benefit you, aren't worth devoting a lot of time to. :hug:

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 Post subject: Re: You don't drink - you are weird?
PostPosted: Fri Aug 10, 2012 9:01 pm 
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Iroto-Chan, Don't worry. You are among friends here and we all respect your decision not to drink. :hug: :hug: :hug: As for those "friends" you were with, they need to accept the fact you're not a drinker.

You are not weird at all. :hug: :hug:

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 Post subject: Re: You don't drink - you are weird?
PostPosted: Sat Aug 11, 2012 7:29 am 
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@Iroto: No offense, but your friends sound lame, what with their not wanting to hang out with you or go to parties with you anymore because you're being responsible! Like Moreach said, I think it's time to get some new friends.

As for me, I don't drink either. I've tried a bit of many kinds of alcohol before most of my American peers have because my parents are European and realized that it was better to demolish the "taboo and therefore cool" reputation that alcohol has in America. And you know what I learned? I HATE the taste of alcohol. Period. I have never been drunk because I could never stomach enough of the stuff to get even close! :brr: The only kinds of alcohol that I have tried and actually liked are peach champagne (tasted like peach juice but too expensive for me to buy by myself) and a Russ'Mass (a liter of half lemonade, half beer--I got halfway through the giant tankard before giving up and was nowhere near tipsy), and that's only because both were sweet. Heck, I don't even like soda. :brr:

And yes, all my American friends and classmates here judge me when I don't partake in the alcoholic drinks, but they're still under the impression that they're the coolest things on earth for walking around Berlin with beers in their hands. I just shake my head and scoff. Drinking for fun is fine, and so is not drinking because you don't find it fun. But drinking because you think that it makes you look cool--now that's dangerous. :(

As for being drunk, there's no way that I ever want to experience that. Both my parents have been drunk only once in their lives each, and that was before I was born. They decided that they got nothing out of the experience, and I decided that I just plain don't want to experience it. If I drink, it will only be when the drink actually tastes good to me and in a context that is fun and safe for me, and even then I won't drink enough to get drunk. That's my choice, and my friends have learned that they either need to respect it or they need to get lost.

Your friends either need to learn to respect your choices, or you need to get some new friends.

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 Post subject: Re: You don't drink - you are weird?
PostPosted: Sat Aug 11, 2012 9:09 am 
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@Iroto-Chan.... The friends that you have that are telling you that drinking is fun are people that you could do without, as what they are wanting (literally) is to go to an early grave. That was like my father, as he used to drink as if there was no "next week", and I have a feeling that his obsession might have booked him into an early grave. As for me, I only drink when I'm with people I feel comfortable with, and, if it's a music gathering (like last night with Kakatsitsi at the Universal Hall and then the bonfire afterwards), I'll have a glass/bottle or two, but not enough to get me totally wasted, and I have never touched drugs or smoked either, and will never, unless it's for legit reasons or it's part of some tribal tradition, and plus, most of the stuff I do and say happens when I'm perfectly sane, so you're not alone in any department that I've mentioned.

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 Post subject: Re: You don't drink - you are weird?
PostPosted: Sat Aug 11, 2012 2:19 pm 
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Alcohol abuse and drugs are bad.... mmmm, yeah. :sigh:

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Last edited by JuJuBe42 on Tue Oct 16, 2012 4:45 am, edited 1 time in total.

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 Post subject: Re: You don't drink - you are weird?
PostPosted: Sat Aug 11, 2012 3:42 pm 
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^ :hug: :hug: :hug: Very sorry to hear that, JuJube42 :( :hug: :kiss:

See, Iv'e already witnessed so many depressing results of alcohol abuse, not only among my friends I was also a witness of public - restaurant riots, where I really threated about my life.
I remember that incident to this day.. when one of our colleagues burst into the room, staggering to and fro, he sudddenly grabbed a half emptied bottle of coke and wanted to start a fight.. luckily enough, there were some other guys in the room and they got a hold of him, before anything worse had happened.. I remember those eyes.. all foggy.. so insane.. God it was horrible!
I don't think I will ever get rid of this trauma :( And yeah, the so called "Friends" have abandonded me, I am not being invited to their parties anymore but I don't give a slighest f*ck. I'd rather have no friends at all. I'm fine with that. ^_^ At least no one's bagging me to have a "Drink" while I don't wish to have one. I have my lipton Mint Ice Tea and that already makes my a happy person :) 8)


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 Post subject: Re: You don't drink - you are weird?
PostPosted: Sat Aug 11, 2012 3:52 pm 
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AnzaBabes93 wrote:
@Rosenrot; your post was spot on; that's exactly how I feel about drinking. Yes, I do drink, but like you I know my limits and I have never been drunk at all, nor do I have any plans to, despite people saying to me they'll get me drunk (the most they ever got me to do was down a vodka and coke. Bleurgh.) I see no appeal whatsoever in getting drunk: I think it's the thought of that loss of control that puts me off the most. My drinking habits mainly involve a glass of wine when I go out to a restaurant or a glass of wine with my parents at the weekend. I generally stay away from spirits as well (although I am rather fond of a glass of Archers and lemonade).



Likewise, my fiance is the same way. He has a very high tolerance for alcohol (must be the German side LOL), I could go into a whole paragraph of what he had at a friends party. In any other person I know, myself included, I would have been passed out drunk. But he was completely sober. Pacing is key, especially in drinking situations.

I found what works best is to NEVER drink on an empty stomach. Have food (lots of carbs) before hand, after one drink (a glass full) have at least 2 glasses of water, keep that ratio going of 1:1:2, and the most you would feel is slightly buzzed. Of course this is also dependent upon your body/weight, etc...

We were at a wedding recently and man oh man was the alcohol flowing. Waiters with trays of import beers, tons of different types of wine... it was heaven for me as I like to just try new things and appreciate the flavor of alcohol. I am not a 'chug chug chug' type of drinker. I paced myself between my two glasses of red and one glass of white wine, with water, food, and just walking around.

My point is you can drink, and remain in charge of yourself while drinking "enough" to be considered "normal" (by their weird standards), but the even bigger point is you shouldn't HAVE to. Saying no thank you should make things very clear.

**and to note, at the wedding no one got violent drunk. There was so much love there everyone was just being silly and loving on everyone lol. It was a nice change of pace to see people being drunk but not belligerent or violent. I've been around drunk violence and I hate it, which is why I refuse to let myself even get close to being drunk. I have no idea how I would be, and I do not wish to find out.

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 Post subject: Re: You don't drink - you are weird?
PostPosted: Sat Aug 11, 2012 4:53 pm 
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Tillicious Girl
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I don't drink, either. My parents were always very strict about it, and I told myself that I would, at the very least, wait until I was 21 to try anything. I'm 22 now, and I still haven't bothered. I just don't feel motivated, I guess.

I know people who are big drinkers. Some of them are my friends. During the school year, there are parties every weekend. EVERY WEEKEND. I don't understand why you would get drunk at all, let alone that often. A dear friend of mine insisted that I should try getting drunk at least once; according to his logic, there is a correct way to do it if you're around the right people, and I can't really judge what being drunk is like until I've done it. This is coming from a person who once decided to get into a fight with the ground after heavy drinking. (Yes, the ground. Like, he was cursing and punching the floor and stuff. I wasn't there to witness this, but I've heard the story several times.)

Speaking of which, I don't really like being around drunk people that much. I've only done it once, while I was still in college. That one time resulted in someone getting arrested for underage drinking. I can't tell you how much I cried due to the guilt I had. I know it was his choice to drink as much as he did (He passed out on the grass; that's how he got caught), but maybe if I had paid more attention to what was going on, I could have helped avert the situation.

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 Post subject: Re: You don't drink - you are weird?
PostPosted: Sat Aug 11, 2012 6:03 pm 
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Paul Doll
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I drink a little bit, probably to the point where I'm a bit buzzed, but I've only been properly drunk once and that is all it took to deter me from getting drunk like that. As it is, I still can't eat pineapple and I still can't drink Sam Adams Oktoberfest beer without getting nauseated. I also can't have fruity air fresheners in my bedroom because the smell makes me sick.

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 Post subject: Re: You don't drink - you are weird?
PostPosted: Sat Aug 11, 2012 9:53 pm 
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I sometimes miss the taste of beer... but the thought of hard alcohol makes me cringe.

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Last edited by JuJuBe42 on Tue Oct 16, 2012 4:46 am, edited 1 time in total.

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 Post subject: Re: You don't drink - you are weird?
PostPosted: Sat Aug 11, 2012 9:56 pm 
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Aawww JuJuBe42 :hug: :hug: :hug: , I'm so sorry about what you went through with your brother and fiance. My uncle passed last year from Jaundice. He got progressively worse about a year after my grandmother died. I still think to this day he couldn't handle that my grandmother had passed. He was diagnosed sometime in January '11 and gone June 29th 2011. It was quick and painful.

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 Post subject: Re: You don't drink - you are weird?
PostPosted: Sat Aug 11, 2012 10:06 pm 
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Thank you Summer Moon & Iroto-chan... Jaundice is pretty gnarly, my brother's eyeballs turned dark yellow but he refused medical attention.

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 Post subject: Re: You don't drink - you are weird?
PostPosted: Sat Aug 11, 2012 11:06 pm 
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Tillicious Girl
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Location: Es gibt keinen guten Weg etwas Schlechtes zu tun. (There is no good way to do a bad thing.) T. L.
I ought to put down my Dad's "dodge" for social drinking. In business in his day you had to partake or be out of the running for promotion (because you were "too odd", "stuffy" or "not a company player"). :roll:

Dad did drink, but he didn't care to be drunk. (His dad drank in the old German style - all day - beers. I also never, ever saw Grandpa drunk.) Grandpa had a Euro attitude (from his Prussian grandparents) and introduced me to everything but the hard stuff by age 4. Like Yotami mentioned, it just taught me alcohol tastes kinda nasty! (This is risky if you have alcoholism in the family - or of the little one gets enough for a "buzz" - a buzz is lost brain cells!) Nowadays in the US this is legally child abuse!

So what did Dad do? He gracefully accepted a cocktail or wine, took a very public smiley sip, placed it somewhere it could be seen, and whenever asked, said "Oh? I already have one, thanks!" and pointed to it. :cham2: Now and then he visited it and moved it, or even took another sip. Nobody ever busted him at this game. :wink:

It's a shame to stoop to subterfuge, but it might help some of you in a party setting. :hug:

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 Post subject: Re: You don't drink - you are weird?
PostPosted: Mon Aug 13, 2012 1:45 pm 
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Alcohol can also be dangerously addictive - my husband suffers from very bad post traumatic stress disorder after being shot 3 times in a violent attack. It was an armed robbery - three armed men with guns in our faces (it's a long and painful story - but in a nutshell I was almost widowed one month after we got married, just after we got back from our honeymoon - the trauma surgeon said he had a 30% chance of surviving the surgery). He did survive and he is alive and well today

The PTSD symptoms started about 4 years later in 2008 and he started self medicating with alcohol. He was drinking to relieve stress and anxiety and started hiding his drinking from our friends and family (and me). Another long and painful story in a nutshell - a lot of support and therapy later and he now does not drink that much anymore (just socially). The gunman shot my husband because he turned around and fought him in order to protect me. My husband saved my life - it is now my turn to save his......so I have given him all the support I can and we have brought a potentially horrific problem under control

Sorry if my story was a little hectic (It's not often I am brave enough to be that open about my experiences) - it's just an example of how alcohol can destroy lives and families - luckily we nipped it in the bud before it got to that point

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